Welcome to my rash Scene 7

Welcome to my rash

SCENE SEVEN

 

(Flora is on a drip with a blanket over her. Kipling walks into the room carrying an over-night bag.)

 

KIPLING
Good morning Flora.

 

FLORA

You're here early.

 

KIPLING

I took the red eye. I came directly from the airport.

 

FLORA

How was your conference?

 

KIPLING

Fine. But not as interesting as your news. I heard your mythic rash is back.

 

FLORA

Yes. It's back and it's got me.

 

KIPLING

The same one you had at Harvard?

 

FLORA

Yes. And it's a brilliant revival.

 

KIPLING

Can I see?

 

FLORA

Doctor Kipling, did you take the red eye back just for my rash?

 

KIPLING

I didn't want to miss it. May I see it?

 

(Flora begins to pull down her blanket.)

 

FLORA

Are you going to set up a reunion for all my dermatologist pals from Harvard? I could sit with my legs apart on a stage at your medical school and we could invite my old friends and I could make some new ones too.

 

(Kipling washing his hands and looks between her legs.)

 

KIPLING

Fascinating. You're absolutely right. Question marks.

 

FLORA

The existential dilemma right between my legs. Who know maybe I'll erupt into writing like “God is Dead” “Is there Free Will?” or what about “All Items 50% off.”

 

KIPLING

Do you mind if I take pictures?

 

FLORA

What?

 

KIPLING

I got a disposable camera at the airport as soon as Rose told me about this. I think it might be really very helpful to us and for other research. Can I take the pictures?

 

FLORA

OK. I'm ready for my close-up.

 

(He stands between her legs clicking his instamatic.)

 

KIPLING

Can you please move your legs apart a little wider?

 

FLORA

Sure.

 

KIPLING

Do you mind if I get in a little closer?

 

FLORA

Be my guest.

 

KIPLING

You're being a very good sport.

 

FLORA

What choice do I have? You know, these photos would make nice Christmas cards. Or maybe a calendar. And of course, there's always the cover of Vanity Fair.

 

KIPLING

Can you pull your panties down slightly?

 

FLORA

You could also post it on the Internet. Maybe on The New Yorker web site with my old bio.

 

KIPLING

I hope I'm not being indelicate.

 

 

FLORA

No. You're just ruining my chances of becoming Miss America .

 

(He continues to take pictures.)

 

KIPLING

All I can say is, it was worth the trip.

 

FLORA

I hope you came back first class. My rash deserves it.

 

KIPLING

Flora, your rash is truly mythic. It deserves to be legendary. Like Venue di Norway's beauty.

 

FLORA

How did you remember that?

 

KIPLING

You're my patient. I try to remember every thing.

 

(He stops taking pictures.)

 

FLORA

So does this mean I am still allergic to myself?

 

KIPLING

Not exactly. We changed your blood chemistry and your body reacted as if it was another invasion. You are not just allergic to yourself but to any process of changing yourself, even if it is ultimately for the better. This is extremely rare and interesting.

 

FLORA

I have no desire to be so innately interesting.

 

KIPLING

Maybe it's what makes you an artist.

 

FLORA

Art makes you an artist.

 

KIPLING

I will give you copies of the pictures after I develop them.

 

FLORA

Good. I can use them as a slide show next time I talk to The Beverly Hills Hadassah.

 

(He pulls the blanket over her.)

 

 

KIPLING

I think I got everything I needed. But do you mind if I send these pictures to some colleagues?

 

FLORA

I want photo approval.

 

KIPLING

Of course you do. This is Hollywood .

 

You know, Flora, next week is your last appointment with us.

 

FLORA

So I should take advantage of the writing colony in cubical nine. Perhaps I'll ask for a double dosage of Demerol as a farewell gift.

 

KIPLING

I trust your imagination on its own.

 

(Flora leans back. Kipling re-enters at the Rabbi.)